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<\/p>\nWhen Chris Cornell, legendary singer of Soundgarden, took his own life after a sold-out show in Detroit, MI in May, the music world was stunned. Nobody saw this coming. Some of the signs were there\u2014a shambling performance and slurred speech\u2014but no one expected anything like this. Then, nine weeks later, a week before the start of a North American tour, Linkin Park frontman Chester Bennington hung himself in a home he had just purchased a month or so prior. Friends say he\u2019d been drinking again, something he\u2019d struggled with for years, and he was said to have been deeply upset about Cornell\u2019s death. But again, no one saw it coming. The music world was taken aback by this tragedy as well, yet it seems there were more fans upset, as Linkin Park\u2019s album sales shot through the roof. Fans of Soundgarden\/Audioslave were upset as well, but it seems the only song anyone wanted to hear was \u201cBlack Hole Sun,\u201d done in tributes from everyone from The Avett Brothers and Norah Jones to Guns \u2018N\u2019 Roses and Pierce The Veil.<\/p>\n
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I was deeply upset, too, in ways that I hadn\u2019t felt before. I was but eight years old when Cobain died, a wee lad. I didn\u2019t really get into Nirvana until I was 13. I was about 16 when Layne Staley died and that hit me, but it was kinda of expected after all the years of heroin abuse. With Cornell\u2019s passing, that leaves Mark Arm, Mark Lanegan, and Eddie Vedder as the only leaders of the grunge movement that haven\u2019t offed themselves. They\u2019ve all had issues, dealing with alcohol and heroin, but they beat their demons and moved on with their lives. Cornell and Bennington had their issues with substances as well and most people thought they\u2019d moved on as well\u2014alas, not so.<\/p>\n
I found myself deeply upset after Cornell died. Listening to songs I like such as \u201cFull On Kevin\u2019s Mom,\u201d \u201cHIV Baby,\u201d and \u201cBirth Ritual,\u201d not to mention \u201cHunger Strike,\u201d I was struck by the fact that no one will ever hear these songs done properly again. That really hit me, harder than I was expecting. I was devastated, but this was a never-before-felt type of devastation. The closest I was felt this was when my great Aunt Belle died of cancer in 2011. That was hard, but I moved on. With Cornell\u2019s death, I found myself in some kind of funky rut that I couldn\u2019t get out of. It was hard to explain and I couldn\u2019t really talk to anybody about it. But I just felt really moody and quiet, even more than usual. I was listening to a lot of Soundgarden and remembering how great their music really is. If someone doesn\u2019t think of them as one of the top five grunge bands of all time, then they\u2019re just lying to themselves.<\/p>\n
My mind didn\u2019t feel like it was in the right place. I went along continuing my routine of work, reviews, and working on an upcoming book, but I felt stuck and I didn\u2019t like it. I\u2019d go out of town, get away from things, and I would feel better, but then I would come back to my routine and I\u2019d feel like mild shit again. I never thought of ending it all; that hasn\u2019t ever really crossed my mind. I\u2019d feel like I was giving up and leaving too many loving people behind who would miss the hell out of me and that wasn\u2019t something I could ever fathom. Some people criticized Head of Korn for calling out Cornell and Bennington for what they\u2019d done, calling them cowards and just generally speaking their truth. I know that one might be going through a lot of inner pain, but there\u2019s always someone there to listen and to help, no matter what you think if you\u2019re on the verge. That\u2019s a belief I\u2019ve always held and will especially continue to heed in these days. <\/p>\n
Cornell is gone, taken from us in a fit of blind, possibly pill-driven depressed frenzy. Bennington decided the same fate for himself, hanging himself while he was home alone in a state of blackness he felt no escape from. We\u2019ll never get anything else from these talents. Maybe Linkin Park will put out unreleased tracks to give fans some closure. It\u2019s been said that Soundgarden was going to conclude work on a new album in the summertime after their tour was completed and Cornell had been working on a fifth solo album, this one of cover songs. Maybe something will come out of it and we\u2019ll be able to hear his amazing voice just one last time. These two were too young for this shit to happen, period.<\/p>\n
What we can do is enjoy the music\u2014although it\u2019s hard to listen to a song like Linkin Park\u2019s \u201cGiven Up,\u201d where the refrain is \u201cput me out of my fucking misery!!\u201d and not feel like you\u2019re listening to a suicide note. Same thing goes for \u201cBlack Hole Sun,\u201d \u201cPretty Noose,\u201d and \u201cThe Day I Tried To Live.\u201d Some songs are just going to sound creepy, no matter the circumstances. But I found that after about two weeks, I started coming around and feeling more like myself again. I can\u2019t help but feel upset when a Soundgarden track comes on the radio, as Cornell\u2019s voice was so legendary and awe-inspiring. To think we\u2019ll never hear it again is the biggest crime of them all. <\/p>\n
All I\u2019m trying to say here is that we can\u2019t let negativity win. No matter how black and dark things get, there\u2019s always someone there to talk to, to share, to cry, whatever it is. I\u2019m reminded of something journalist Mark Prindle wrote in a foreword to an interview he did with Dead Milkmen bassist Dave Blood just before he hung himself. Prindle wrote, \u201cAnd if you’re absolutely miserable, CHANGE YOUR LIFE. Save up to move somewhere else. See a psychiatrist. Get a divorce. Adopt a puppy. Make friends in chat rooms\u2026 Whatever \u2013 it’s your only life. If you feel trapped, escape into another aspect of life. The world is enormous, and there are lots of places to go, people to meet and things to do. Just DON’T GIVE UP. Because believe it or not, people will miss you. Try to squeeze every possible morsel of happiness out of life that you can in this limited time you have, because you WILL be dead some day, but you will NEVER be alive again (most likely).\u201d In the end, the best thing we can do is kick back, listen to some music and realize, \u201cHey, life\u2019s not that bad after all. Might as well enjoy it!\u201d <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
When Chris Cornell, legendary singer of Soundgarden, took his own life after a sold-out show in Detroit, MI in May, the music world was stunned. Nobody saw this coming. Some of the signs were there\u2014a shambling performance and slurred speech\u2014but no one expected anything like this. Then, nine weeks later, a week before the start […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":49035,"template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false},"tags":[],"feature_type":[5606],"class_list":["post-47834","feature","type-feature","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","feature_type-essay"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dailyvault.adishjain.in\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/feature\/47834","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dailyvault.adishjain.in\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/feature"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dailyvault.adishjain.in\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/feature"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dailyvault.adishjain.in\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/dailyvault.adishjain.in\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/feature\/47834\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dailyvault.adishjain.in\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/49035"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dailyvault.adishjain.in\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=47834"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dailyvault.adishjain.in\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=47834"},{"taxonomy":"feature_type","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dailyvault.adishjain.in\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/feature_type?post=47834"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}